Be a man...

Last week I went to conference for youth workers in Žilina. The ministry called Kompas does this conference and this one was the 15th. Since Kompas does ŠPM as well, and I am a student there, I was at this conference as a volunteer. But before I’ll tell you more about this conference let me tell you first about other conferences I’ve been to...
The very first one was in September 2007, just two months after I became a Christian. It was a youth conference. At this conference God showed me a new way for my life and He started showing me what He wants me to do. As well at this conference (through a hard experience but anyway, I’ve got to understand who God really is in His mercy, love, forgiveness and justice. This was quite a big step forward in my walk with God.
The second conference I went to was KPM – exactly a year ago. At that time I was deciding whether to join the Dorast team or not. Whether that’s what God wants me to. As well there was this money issue since I would have to leave my part-time job in order to do Dorast (and ever since I was 13 I always had a job and some kind of income and I was quite independent from my parents – speaking of money). So I was used to always have some money and now it would mean that I have to give this up in order to do Dorast. At last year’s KPM I’ve decided to go for it and join the team. I remember saying to God: Look God, you want me to do Dorast for you? OK. I’ll do it you You MUST take care of me. I’ll work for you only in the case You promise me You will provide everything I need. OK? And after the conference I said to others that I’m accepting the offer to join the team.
So these two conference were quite milestones in my Christian life. And that’s why I expected next conference not to be any different. And right the first day of the conference I found out what was God trying to teach me and show me. And I already wrote about this so I’m not going to do it again. Here it is: http://marektt.blogspot.com/2008/09/blog-post.html Well, just in short God let me see the truth about me – and it was not nice at all.
A month ago I went to a preaching conference and at that one God made my passion for preaching to grow and more mature. Still it’s something that needs to be developed so greatly but this conference was a good one and useful in many way. Most of all it helped me to really realize how important the preaching is.
Now KPM came once again. And I was wondering what it’s going to bring. What the message is going to be. What will God want to communicate to me. So let me tell you what was the personal message for me and how it affected my life, ok?
Mostly it was because of one lecture I went to. It was about man’s leadership (in family, in church) and what it really means to be a man. To lead and to take the responsibility – to be a man. On Friday I realized one thing. That I was running away from what God calls me to do. For the past three weeks I was trying to find a way how to get out of this and yet I would not be the one that backed off. Why did I want to do that (don’t I remember what happened to Jonah when he decided to ignore what God called Him to do?). And throughout the whole conference (the lecture I already mentioned, the speakers during the main program and people I talked to) God was challenging me do take what He’s calling me to do. Not to run way but to go straight ahead. Not to fear but to trust. To be responsible. Simply – to be a man He calls me to be. And so I said to God once again: Look Lord, You got me into this. I didn’t choose this way. And if you expect me to go for it You must promise me You’re going to take care of me and everything else otherwise I’m not into this if You’re not. You got me into this so either get me out of it or help me to keep going. I see it quite same as Moses saw it when God said to him that He won’t go with the Israelites to the promise land otherwise He would have to destroy them. And what does Moses say to Him back? If your Presence does not go with us, do not send us up from here(Ex 33:15). Moses is saying that if God is not directly and completely involved in what we’re doing it’s better not to do it at all. For He is so important in our lives.
And so I left the conference as a man who is decided to take the responsibility for what God has given him. To trust the Lord that He know better then I and He knows why He’s given me this all. I got to trust Him. To be responsible and most of all – to be a man.

my dad and i

well guys,
do you remember my previous post how i spend the whole day with my dad alone? let me tell y'all how it has been since then. it's almost unbelieveble how this small trip helped and changed my entire relationship with my dad. you know, it's just something that has never been there before. for the first time in my life i can say that i love my dad. that i respect him and honor him. in couple of hours i'm off to zilina for a youth conference and i'll return on sunday. my dad just left the home and i won't be with him until then. and so i said goodbye to him and he did to me. and as he was walking out of the room he turned around and huged me. i've never had a real hug with my dad before. but this time it was something i longed for so long...

and you know what's the craziest thing about this all? that all that had to happen was to go on a hike! through one hiking trip God changed everything. to Him be the glory!

somebody's gonna get it...

in a week from today i leave to austria to spend a week there. there's this english project at our school that i stared when i came to this school. it's an international project where schools from europe (slovakia, czech republic, austria, germany, france, ireland) are working together. the first year at high school i went for a week to germany. what i do there is that i live with a student in his family during my stay. the school does many kinds of activities for me and we have lots of fun. in the afternoons and the evening i spend my time with the family.

last year i went to czech republic. at this time i was already a christian and i've decided that one of my goals will be that i want to share the good news with this family. right from the first day i came i was looking for an opportunity to share the gospel (i didn't really want to pop the question out of blue). the day before i was suppose to leave i noticed a big cross hanging on the wall in one of the rooms. so when i was eating the dinner i just said: i saw you have that nice cross downstairs. are you christians? and that opened the door for a conversation that lasted for over an hour and a half. before i left i was with girl that i was living in the family with and i gave her this small gideon bible and said to her: you may think you don't need this now but i want you to keep this. because there might be a day when you need it. she took it and i left.

this time i'm going to austria for a week. i'll stay in a family where the student's name is steven. he's 17 and i'll get to spend quite a lot of time with him. yesterday after the sunday service i said to paula, that i won't see her for two weeks cause i go to austia. and she remembered what i've done when i went to czech republic and she said: oh, somebody's gonna get it. and right after that she added: somebody's gonna get the gospel.

so my friends, i want to ask you for prayers. my main goal during next week will be to share the hope we all have in Jesus - the gospel. and please, just pray that God would use me there and that i would not be blind when the opportunity will come. instead i would recognize it and would go for it with the goal to fulfill what Jesus calls all of us to do - to go and make disciples of all nations...(Mt 28:19)

My first father-son-only time

Just to give you a short backdrop. The relationship I have with my parents is not really good. I mean I'm not happy about the way it is. And I believe my parents see it the same way. The problem is that we're not able to find a way to each other. When I try I miss them and they don't know what I was doing. When they try I don't get them. So we both try but we always miss. It's like we use a different channel to communicate at and we never get the same.

About a month ago I was thinking about my relationship with my dad. You know, I realized that I don't have any. I mean, he's my father but that's it. We have no relationship and that's why it's hard for us to get along well. Then I tried to look into my past to see some history I had with my dad when I was a kid. But there's nothing. Well, there are few things I remember but it's not that great compared that I'm almost nineteen. And so I decided to start new history with my dad.

I was thinking of what I could do with him. How to spend a good time and improve our relationship. I got an idea of going out for a hike. And so I was just waiting for a good weather to come. In the past couple of weeks it was really nice and the spring has come to Trnava and I decided that it's the right time to actually do something. So last week I said to my dad: Can you do me a favor? Don't make any plans for Friday. Just stay home and let me to schedule your day (he had a day off). He agreed and I began planning. It was nice to see that he called me on Thursday and asked me whether it's still going to happen. I could have heard in his voice that he was excited about it (I didn't tell his until the day before what we're gonna do).

So on Friday morning we took a train to a village near by and began our hike (I wasn't really sure about the hike cause I was using the map only and so it was quite possible for me to mess up and get lost:). It didn't take long and we began talking. Couple of times he said that he should have done such a thing (like to take his family out for a trip) a long time a ago. And so I was really happy to see that he realized that building a relationship is an important thing.

I spend with him eight hours that day. It were just him and I. It was our very first time since I remember that I've done anything with my dad. After those eight hours of talking I got to know him much better. We got a lot closer to each other and it helped me to understand my dad a lot more. And he was so excited that he wants to do these kind of thing more often. I think that our relationship got into the whole new level that day.

I just hope that one day, when I'll have my own family and my own children, I won't make the same mistake my dad did. That I would forget how importat it is to have and build the relationship with your own family.

When God's mercy and love suprises you

I'm not talking here about being suprised by God's mercy and love because God Himself says that He is love and He is merciful to many. But what I'm talking here about is when God does something the way that it over exceeds all your imaginations.

Last weekend we had ŠPM. Unfortunately it was our last one in Žilina (there's one more but it's not gonna be in Žilina) so I felt kind of sad that we won't come here for ŠPM anymore. And I looked back into the past and I started from October when we first came to Žilina. I entered the room and saw quite a few people that I had never seen. Actually, Dominik was the only one I knew (and one guy from Trnava - Jožo - but we kind of got to know on the train on the way to Žilina). And I see all of these months as it passed by. We went to Romania, we had TVT in Tatras, youth in Žilina and many more. And then all of these times during the "study" time (I put study in quotes because I never felt the way it was a school - a school is boring, this was not:) when I've learned so much and God was teaching me through these people about Himself in such a great way.

And now I see it's April already and only one more meeting ahead of us. It's sad on one hand that soon it's going to be over. Though on the other hand I'm happy cause it means that we've been through this all and we've been given so much and so now we can go back to our church and we can pass down what has been passed down to us.

And when I came to Žilina for ŠPM the first time I thought that all I'm going to get from this is just some study and knowledge. But God had greater things in mind. Not just that He was teaching me how to be a better servant of His but also He gave me many new people to meet. If someone would have told me in October what all is ŠPM going to bring into my life I would probably not believe him. But it has brought way more than I thought it could.

And that's why I'm so thankful in these days. That He had much better plans for me that I could imagine. He has done way more then I ever expected Him to do. I didn't ask. I didn't even know that I wanted it or needed it for that matter. But as Jusus says: your Father knows what you need before you ask him. (Mt 6:8)

Give thanks to the LORD, for he is good;

his love endures forever.

(Psalm 118:1)